Poets, painters and puddings. These three things make the world as it ought to be.

The morning mist that fill my heart with desire

Seasons of Mists, and they don't last long, but I am so lucky just to be able to look and see the glory that abounds before me. I thought I would give you a peek view as well.

Cookery Course Tommorrow

I told my niece Rosie that my camera was not taking close up photograph's at all well. I have just downloaded my photos and look what I have found a photo taken by Rosie, she did say that my camera didn't have a problem. I think it is probably me that does not know how to use it properly.

I am starting a cookery course tomorrow, and madness reigns in my kitchen, there is so much cleaning to do and so little time to do it in. At the moment all I want to do is be outside and paint the morning mists disappointed as the morning sun cause them to rise and leave their soggy morning sleep, colour golden green, reds and brown feel their way into my consciousness and help me to lift the slumber from my eyes and awaken to a day where my only desire is to paint the beauty I see, and my only wonder is, why oh why to I prevent myself from doing the one thing in this world that gives me joy and bliss.

 

The Jewel Week

This is the purple post, as it is the favourite colour of my nieces Kim and Rosie and my sister Ellie.

I pushed my parking card in the machine, no charge, I had only stayed long enough to kiss my family good bye, the sun was still hot, not so hot as last week though, when I picked them up for the Jewel Week, the pervading waft of autumn was floating on the sea breeze. My car empty and quiet, mostly from my banal singing and chatter, left the airport and and headed toward the auto route through Hyeres. I stopped at a traffic light the only car on the road i that most singular of moments. The crisp burnt leaves danced on the hot tarmac, shot upward from a singe on the road hovered and dropped again, the make shift veggie store, empty bar three signs,GOODBYE, THANK YOU AND SEE YOU NEXT YEAR. That's it isn't it I thought the quiet months are upon us and the worry of winter approaching. Hey ho.

Thank goodness for the most beautiful week and aunty could possibly have, with my two beautiful neices and my lovely sister Ellie, we played in the pool, we went to the Islands on the boat, we went to the Theatre, we had dinner in Tour Tour as the sun set.

We went to Paradise, and I'll tell you more about that soon, as it is time for me to go now too.

Tara 

There's a star fish waiting in the sea

 

We went the other day, very early, to the Porquerolles Islands just off the tip of Hyeres, our favourite place with our boat Chips, because that is about as far as the boat can go, and who could wish for more. We dragged ourselves out of bed at 5.30 am, so that we could get here at sun up or just after, and although the dragging was a heavy and difficult experience for me, David was just the opposite and rather painfully cheerful for that time in the morning.

 One of Napolean's old forts, with 3 meter deep holes for canons, it is falling apart, but inspires the imagination to journey into the past, to see the soldiers, the canons, the boats the fighting. The ghosts in an empty place that looks calmly out to sea and patiently waits for inquisitive tourists to peer through the iron gates and wonder.

After our walk, we took chips around the corner to another little bay where we stayed for the morning snorkling and in my case sleeping.
this is where we found the star fish and we found some huge ones whilst snorkling, they are startingly bright.

It is my birthday and my darling sister Ellie and my divine neices are here and I am going to chat with them.

Tara

 

Dogs, boys, rocks and water.

I hear David creap back into the house, I thought I would have time to write before he came home. I hope it is not all over now, it is a lazy sunday morning and I would like it to stay that way. David took Jack to the airport today 5 am for his sins of being a father, I got up and helped for my sins of being a step mother.

 It is beyond doubt, quite beautiful, although the last few days have been frought with tension, anxiety about the future, fear of the unknown, and disagreable relationships, the last few days have been filled with fun laughter and adventure.

I have been off work now for a week, it was busy, busy, busy and so very hot, hot oven hot sun hot Tess, cooked brain, insane, pour the ingredients down the drain, half baked home made cake, melted ice, not so nice. Sweaty palms and sweaty legs, steaming pork and scrambled eggs, misifit pudding and guests awaiting, one or two palates salavating, what great dinner would be created tonight, and would I the chef be alright. Rounds of applause, I couldn't disquise my suprise, Tess you have surpassed yourself, they said, and I had thought, they won't want me any more after tonight. Felt like hell, turned out well, what will be what, who can tell.

So, first day home we went to the Lac St Croix with the Munro family, that is my sister in law, her husband and daughter and us three plus the dogs, twas a lovley morning.

Boy and dog swimming at the lake.

Then the following day we were up with the lark and off to the market, the boy and man, whilst the woman stayed behind to do the things that women are supposed to do, like pack and make lunch and fill hampers and make sure we have the right clothes, actually David does it most of the time, I am just more fussy, and like to have enough stuff with me, like clean clothes and a tooth brush. Our first stop was the Canyoning, pictured first two photo's and below.

Rock sculpture by David Nelson

I have to end it there with this delightful picture of my husband almost embedded in the smooth rockface as he slides inelegantly down towards the pool.

Tara

Estatically Happy

Jack's face of pure joy, we took Jack canyoning as they call it in France, we went up the vallee de tinee and Jack went with several others and an instructor and followed the river down from it's source in the mountain, the final splash was down a veritacal shoot about 7 meters in height, into a rock pool of green blue irridescant water, Jack came shooting down and David was there to take this amazing photograph.

Spiritually, for me this photograph says it all, those sayings you reap what you sow, the knock on effect, every action we take affects the entire world, our thoughts our love our hate our emotions. Well Jack's knock on effect even gave the splashes of water smiley faces, yes, yes take another look at the photograph and you will see, eyes, nose, and a smiley mouth.

What joy and happiness to behold, I am going to make this photograph my page saver.

Vide Atelier

Download SOLDES VIDE

Click on the above and see the invitation

Twenty years yesterday

Our mum died twenty years ago yesterday.

Two weeks ago, I remembered, the first twinge of grief came, I was sitting at my desk at home, and recognised the feeling, every year late July early August I start to dream and think and remember our mum, not necessarily the bad bits and who she had become in later years, but all that was beautiful and extra ordinary about this remarkable person. Immensely talented, intelligent, clever, witty, well read, a wonderful mother when she was able, caring, loving, forgiving. The thing is, it is always so easy easy to condone a parent for not being this or not being that, or not doing enough, for doing to much, for not being there, the list goes on, and as I child I think one is unable to either understand a person as a whole, flawed and yet perfect in the same instance.

I was 17 when I was hit hard like a blow to the stomach of how relentlessly difficult mum's life had become, it is so easy to say 'we choose our own path.. life is what you make it...' all those cliched sayings that negate life in it's totallity, in its struggle to survive against all odds, and then sometimes in its giving up, because there is no fight left for life and the comfort of death is all encompassing, warm and inviting, but there is the moment, when death eludes and life doesn't function a no mans land, where pain prevails and sad thoughts and anguish flood through and there seems so little space for happiness left.

 

She was sitting on the stairs of the house in Balham, the removal van outside. The twins where with my father and Sally, my eldest sister away on her travels to Australia, and I was living in my granny's flat in Victoria, selfishly unaware of anyone but myself. The phone rang, it was mum, she told me she was desperate, desperate and alone and she was so sorry to have called me, so sorry to be a nuisance, but could I go and help the pain was to much for her to bare. It was quite hard in those days to reach my callous teenage heart, but she did and I went. I saw my mum on the stairs broken, and mostly that is how she stayed until she died, but we still had moments of who she was, and I think for me, once I have sifted through all the hard parts and got to the core, I can come back to the woman, our mother who I loved, who we all loved and do love I am sure so much.

Every year for the past few years I have always told myself I would do something special on the anniversary of mums death, but I am always working and never do. Yesterday might have been pretty much the same, had I not received an email from one of my sisters in Australia, reminding  me of the date and of the sadness she was feeling. Ha, I thought, no wonder I have been crying for the last two days and feeling so low and melancholy, I always manage to block out the actual day. So quite luckily for me, I was only working the morning until 11 am and I had planned to take myself away as far away as I could get, time permitting, from everything and every one. So when I recieved Charlie's email, I thought I am going to dedicate this day to my mum. And so I did.

So our mum, besides being an amazing costume designer, set designer, artist, gardener, dress maker, up holsterer, shelf maker, and on and on, was a fantastic painter of wild flowers and insects, she knew all the latin and english names and painted some of the prettiest water colour flower paintings I have ever seen, and although my water colours below are not my best by a long shot, they are important to me because yesterday I painted them in hommage to a great mum.

I sat in a field of wheat, butterflies landed on me and stayed, even when I moved, bees buzzed around me and seemed to land on the thistle just at the right moment.

One of the long lasting teachings of love my mother ever gave me, was the gift of God in my life. Mum always said she was an athiest, but when once in the spinny I asked her what God was, I was nine and finding it all so confusing, she held my hand and told me to look at the sky, to see the clouds, to feel the wind on my face, to smell the autumn leaves decomposing, to watch the birds the bees the life all around me and know it is all God, and so it for me today, and so it is when I need healing I need a quiet place in nature, to feel to truly feel and become one with God and then I know I am alive.

 The road to bliss.

We used, as children to cling and huddle in the groove, made especially for us by the tree itself of course, to feel it's warmth and comfort, a huge old oak tree, up the lane towards the village gates, a special and magic place, and by all accounts not just privvy to the Baker girls but to all the other children in the village.

 Uncovered Hill

Covered Hill

So at five pm I climbed to the top of the hill and waited for the thunder and lightening and rain, to pour down on me, to cleanse me and to let me know that in this moment, all is well in my life and I hope that it is all well with all my sisters who I love with all my heart.

 

 

 

Marvels of the Med continued

Charlie said I sound sad, who knows perhaps I am, closing down my studio has been a heart breaking happening for me. We have a lovely new person coming to live there, but putting all my art in my shed feels like I am putting my soul in the shed, and I don't know how to get back out. I will though as I have to

I cannot survive without painting, but on this one I am going to have to use all the faith I can muster and have the trust that things will work out even better than before.

 

So on the menu we had

Grated salad of carrot and courgettes, with white balsamic vinagar, truffle oil, pine nuts, mint and shives.

The traditional tomato and mozerella

The delightful and never boring green salad, with the fresh herbs from the garden.

The oven roasted aubergine slices, slightly flavoured with cumin and tamari

colour enhanced with the yummy roasted red peppers.

The bulgar wheat salad, with I cannot remember what I put in it.

the cold curried chicken.

The Seared Tuna and Lime Pickle Sauce

The Fillet of Beef with the Pesto Dressing

The amazing cheese plate

and

The Fruit Salad.

One of the guests told me in a hushed but delighted voice that his great friend from the best restaurant in monaco was coming, it didn't really bother me much, until he came, and then I felt judged and nervous, silly really it was such a simple country lunch, not out to impress at all just for people to enjoy what they eat, they did everyone said how much they loved it, everyone that is apart from the best restauranter in Monaco.

Ho HUM

 

Marvels of the Med

It is true you know, the vegies down here are so tasty and delicious.

The cicadas are busy with their noise outside, the builders, the drivers, the cars, the birds, it is busy, and I am quiet staying at a friends house whilst I work in St Paul, for those of you who don't know St Paul, it is a picture perfect hilside medieval village in the south of France, not far from Vence and from the coast. I work here every summer, and this summer I have the great good fortune of having a friends house to stay in, whilst she is away on holiday.

Ever year I cook for a chateau called Le chateau de Grand Cros, I make a large country style buffet and I really enjoy it. This year, we had roasted fillet of beef, which I pan fried on a high heat first, then smothered it with homemade pesto and roasted again on a high heat for about 20 minutes. I have to stop writing something keeps going wrong I will try again later.